Baby, when to try again? 

Our baby girl is not so much a baby anymore. In fact we’ve recently celebrated her first birthday. This milestone has got us thinking about whether we want to roll the dice again and try to give her a sibling. I have many thoughts on what the perfect age gap is: too close and they might be constantly competing; too big and they won’t have anything in common; can we afford two lots of nursery fees or should be wait until the oldest is at preschool? If we wait am I going to be too old? With all of these thoughts I keep coming to the same conclusion: Why am I trying to plan something which is largely outside of my control. 

Before we started trying the first time around we went through a similar thought process and decided to put off trying until we had bought and decorated our house. Looking back we now see how naive we were. We believed that we would start trying to conceive and within 12 months we’d definitely have a baby. It didn’t work out like that. We did fall pregnant quickly but it took 5 pregnancies including a molar pregnancy before we brought our baby home. My husband now says to anyone thinking about starting a family that they should start trying for a baby as soon as they don’t feel that getting pregnant would be disastrous. Don’t wait until you’re truly ready. Once you conceive you’ll have 9 months to get ready (and that’s if your pregnant is successful). 

I really suffered with morning sickness during every pregnancy and my fear is that if I got pregnant again I wouldn’t be able to give Charlotte the attention she deserves as I’d be struggling with sickness (or worse another loss) but I really want to give her a brother or sister if possible so I think we’re just going to cross our fingers and see what happens. Watch this space.